Just another day at home.

On Medical leave for 3 days. Happy? Not really so I suppose. You see, my daily routine has been somehow platitudinous. Monotonous, robotic; what else? Though life at camp is not much better, what does good when I’m all alone at home, with no person to talk too, doing things that are done over and over again. AHHHHHHH… I just want to scream.

On a happier note, today is me and my baby’s 2nd month anniversary. Hoho…. See how time flies. I hope she liked my present. Have not seen her use it. * use it ok baby? *


hmmm.... i do not know what to continue. Anyways.................... i sort of got addicted to DOTA. I know im slightly, or maybe VERY late, in starting to learn to play this game. BUT still, its fun and really addictive. Maybe Uncle chee lai was right. No. He IS right. He should know what i mean. *winks at Snorlex. i know u are reading my blog*.... ( no offence )

:) bb... i will be going back to camp on wed. 11pm.

Am i dissapointed ?

im not.

Im scared

As im typing this words now; feeling down and sick.

The virus monsters have attacked my fort and it looks like my
stronghold is falling into their hands soon. Nevertheless, i shall be strong,
or rather, try to be strong.

It might just be a facade after all. In fact, i feel useless; Beyond power, aye...
its a retribution i say. i dilapidated my very own temple of god through neglect; the wiles of the world. The modern world. I might be very much crapping now.
I shall end thus.

A turn of events.

If u remember, i was posted to 5 Singapore infantry regiment as a signaller. Other than suffering from depression due to extreme culture shock, the life there is STILL horrendous. Macabre events huants your subconscious mind even at rest. Dreams are never meant to scare you; were they ?

Friday 16 March 4.12 pm. Sitting down on the floor as usual, with my head lowered in preparation for another stay in on a Friday evening, my sgt shot me dead with basically 10 words. Note the words " shot me dead". Meaning that the old depressed self was officially pronounced dead. These words of joy still rings in my head up till date.

" Barry, pack yr things now, u are going home tonight.". I was posted out.

As i type these words of joy, im currently in my new camp, using internet, seating in an air-conditioned office, stomach filled with canteen food. U see, i just had breakfast at the canteen with my sgt. FYI, my new posting is a signaller in a Racky and survey team, which is a team that supports an Artillery Unit. Its the nearest camp near to my house, in terms of distance and accessibility, that i've ever been at.


Going back. Monday night was a memorable day for me and my Baby. We had a heart to heart talk and trashed out cracks that were surfacing in our relationship. I do not know why but i feel much closer to her now. Much in love; much as one. I hope she feels the same way too. Of course, i do want the avowel between us, which we gave each other in trust; affirmation, to be kept.

Thats it i suppose. I think i'll be able to blog much more often. :)

What is sexual is what gives a man an erection. If there is no inequality, no violation, no dominance, no force, there is no sexual arousal.



Given today’s society’s ethnic and moral standards; let’s face it, being sexual is part of the society.


Come on old people, let’s all be proud of our sexuality.

ENTHUSIASTIC ....

Im sorry. I just could not resist the temptation of another post. I know.
Its like my third post today. Its just so tempting...

Arghsss, i shall resist it and store my passion for blogging till tmoro.
Lets pray.

Confession

Thaumaturgy. Personally, I’m of this view that this word depicts in exact precision vis-à-vis my relationship with my baby. Too strong a word; It isn’t. Well, we can expect the non-expected things to occasionally surface in life but sometimes you do sit to ponder how these unthinkable, preposterous things happen. It just does. Without any reason whatsoever.

Its human nature though, to try to find the answer to these near impossible happenings, and usually, due to the fact that they can’t and not wanting to admit their inability, they just come to the conclusion that “ Its god’s will”. Its embedded subconsciously I tell u. Well at least it happened to me.

I’m also apologetic as I did not even wanted to make known this relationship to my friends. Though I smiled and treated it as a game, not wanting to let out this underground secret, I knew deep down that I was not comfortable with the fact of letting others know esp. cause it was her. I even found it ludicrous as to why it would have started. Strong words used here ain’t it.

Anyway, things happen for a reason and I’ve changed my thinking and feelings about this relationship, this girl of mine. Till date, all I can say is that my feelings for her have grew to a extend that even if we’re not together in the future, I would still be there, caring and concerning for her.

Baby, U should know how much I love you.

Am i back ? perhaps ; perhaps ..

I never thought I would ever see the daylight of this blog again. Well, perhaps this blog was started due to puerile thoughts of Barry’s younger days. I’ve changed; well at least I hope so, thus hoping to post more meaningful prose of my older years.

What sparked this sudden revival?
What was the catalyst?

Hmmm… I’ve really got to thank my baby. She was the one that found this blog and asked me to continue it. Wait !! Do not get heart failure. She’s my girlfriend, not my child.
Don't ask why. I just call her that.

U see, I’ve got many things to write about, to let my friends see, but due to time constrains and a short attention span personality, I shall only continue when my mood allows me to do so.